


The Four Stages of Amalgamation

by hopefulundertone



Series: forever brothers [1]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Amalgamates, Bromalgamate, Bromalgamate AU, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-20
Updated: 2015-11-20
Packaged: 2018-05-02 13:44:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5250323
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hopefulundertone/pseuds/hopefulundertone
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Papyrus and Sans meld together thanks to a lethal injection of determination, all secrets are laid bare, and a conversation, such as it is, must be had.<br/>(A take on the Bromalgamate at its moment of creation.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Four Stages of Amalgamation

**Author's Note:**

> so! has anyone seen sushinfood and moofrog's bromalgamate au ? because i have, and it broke me. :) i didnt think there was anything sadder than canon sans, but here we go. this is just my take on what it must have been like when they melded?  
> This is left purposely flexible, so the bare bones (no pun intended) is: papyrus was the one injected with determination, and 'melted' onto sans, resulting in the Bromalgamate. 
> 
> also warning: this might be a bit hard to understand; i fiddled with the settings and stuff as much as i could to make it as abstract as possible (idk thats the vibe i get from amalgamates) and trust me it was such a pain in the ass

The melding had been painful beyond belief. Sans had done his best, trying to hold Papyrus as he melted, but in the end, it'd just made things worse. Every drop of his brother's essence on his bones was agony, the determination within them sizzling holes through his own bones in a moment. Perhaps he realised what was happening as soon as the first drops touched him. He could even have survived. But ironically enough, his own brand of determination was his downfall. Soon enough, you were melting into each other, and the meld had been white-hot with pain. You'd barely been able to breathe, but still you struggled, pushing Papyrus up, trying your best to hold him while he screamed. Your hands linked, and then melted into each other, followed shortly by your bodies. The last to go had been your minds, and the despair, both yours and the feedback from Papyrus, had almost been worse than the pain. For a while, you couldn't think, couldn't breathe, couldn't function properly. Nothing made sense in the seemingly everlasting battle between the two of you, both fighting against each other to be free. 

Then, slowly, painfully, your minds had melted into each other. It'd been inevitable, of course, but so, so terrifying. Two voices where there used to be one, two thoughts where there should ever only be one. You-they-us-he-we gasped, a shuddering, awful sound that tore at your-their-our-his senses, and fingers that no longer existed grasped at rapidly disappearing freedom. And suddenly, all was white, and nothing mattered except the two of you, and the almost physical pain of your souls being laid bare. It was almost as if you stood before each other, and one of you shook and cried, and the other you screamed without stopping.

First came betrayal, and with it, a tearing emptiness filled with echoing lies. "i'm taking sentry duty tonight" were nights spent at Grillby's, drowning your misery, and "sorry, i'll be home late, cleaning up" were times spent in the cold, desperately wishing for numbness. "just scratches" and "fell down" to explain away grooves in bones where there shouldn't have been were gleaming edges wielded with shaking phalanges, and "i'm fine, only tired." revealed themselves as endless despair. Underneath, too, more of an old wound then a fresh injury is "great": and a cutting tongue repeats- "pathetic pathetic pathetic useless useless weak" and "popular" is "alone and unloved", and your bones tremble under the force of the harsh words. 

Then comes fury, fury at the lies, fury at the mistrust, fury at the burden one - both - neither of you ~~should have~~ had to bear alone. One of you is angry, both of you are angry, you are angry. One of you - both of you - all of you hates and hates and hates, and neither of you can back down and it's tearing you apart. **how could i have-**   _Y_ _OU SHOULD HAVE JUST-_ **it was a-** _I COULD HAVE HANDLED-_ **_i SPaReD YoU_** \- _STOP_ **stop** _STOP_ **stop** _STOP LET ME HELP-_ **nothing you could've-** _HELPED YOU-_ **you don't understand how could you-** _HAVE TRIED!_

Next is guilt, stewing in self-hatred. Pure, undiluted waves of it, a hollow ache that you hate, and a different you is crying now. It's true, then, that you are pathetic, worthless, not good enough, an awful b r o t h e r ! You didn't see, didn't care, perhaps was too afraid to see what was before you, too afraid to open your eyes ! ** _no YEs nO YeS n---;_**  could-haves and would-haves, then: could have helped you, could have saved you, could have been a better brother better son, could have done more more more. would have done whatever it took, but none of that matters now, the point is you didn't, and that makes you an awful person.  **i couldn't save you couldn't save any of yoU pathetic isn't it** _I DIDN'T SEE I DIDN'T KNOW BUT MAYBE I DID AND I STILL DIDN'T HELP USELESS WORTHLESS_

_**!N O T TT RU UE!** _

there was ~~nothing something anything~~ you could (n't?) have done, how ~~could would should~~  you ? ? you did all you could. _MY FAULT_ **my fault** _MY FAULT_ **my** _FAULT_ **what** _MORE_ **could** _~~i you we~~ HAVE **done ? ¿ ? ¿ ?**  
_ the blame game is for babybones.

Now perhaps explanations and apologies are in order; 

**sorry** _SORRY_ **sorry** _SORRY_ **sorry** _SORRY_ **sorry** _SORRY-_

**_i CARE so MUCH about yOu  ¡ !_ **

**/did it all for you**

_/DO ANYTHING FOR YOU_

**/to protect you**

_/TO SHOULDER YOUR BURDEN_

 

**_; sorRY soRRY PLEASE understand ; of ff co ur r s e  
_ **

**_/aNd wHaT tO dO nOw? ¿  
_**

 

{fOrGiVeN.}

 

Finally, and only then, or perhaps then only, love. Two souls as one, two hearts as one, brimming with determination; NEVER again nO MOre SecreTs. Determination that neither of you will ever suffer like that alone, will never have to bear their burden alone, will never have to be alone ever again. Determination to make and keep a promise: you will always be there. 

You are you but so much more, then.

**you love him** _YOU LOVE HIM **NeVeR LeTTiNg gO agAiN** YOU WILL NEVER HAVE TO BEAR SUCH A HEAVY BURDEN AGAIN _ **best brother i could've wished for** _TOGETHER_ **together** _NEVER APART **love LOVE love LOVE love LOVE love LOVE love LOVE**_

 

<LL oO Ov VVv e! !>

 

and, quite suddenly, you are home, like you've never been but will always be, now until forever. 

 

Two skulls emerge from your misshapen mass, and carefully, you separate yourself, but not really; they are separate in the way your fingers are separate, but still so much together. Two hands as well, curious holes through the palm. They quickly gravitate toward each other, palms fitting perfectly, if a little stickily, together. And that's what matters, isn't it?

 

~~*l o v e~~

~~*t o g e t h e r~~

~~*h o m e~~

 

For a moment, your skulls face each other, and the taller skull envelopes the smaller one. Perhaps, if you were still separate, it would resemble one of you wrapping your arms around the other and resting your skull on theirs. To comfort, protect, shield, hug? All of them and more, certainly. You make an awful squelching sound as you edge towards the entrance of the lab, but it doesn't bother you. You can't wait to show Alphys how happy you are. 

 

So happy.

**Author's Note:**

> hope you enjoyed! please tell me if anything (or everything)'s hard to read/hard on your eyes, i'll fix whatever it is! comments appreciated! (also spot the twenty one pilots reference woop im trash) 
> 
> i kinda projected-ish a bit of my own perspective onto this so don't mind that, i just care about my own bro HAHA  
> someday i hope to come back to this and brush up on the different perspectives on the same emotions and stuff but THAT DAY IS NOT TODAY


End file.
